America's Best Sports City

St. Louis 101

A primer on what to wear, do and say during your visit to any one of St. Louis’ sports venues. Written by Leslie Gibson McCarthy – a former editor/writer at The Sporting News and mother of two teenage sons who spend most of their waking moments monitoring SportsCenter on ESPN.

What to wear in America’s Best Sports City:

Red, red, and more red. Busch Stadium is a sea of red from April through October.
You can get away with white if it’s a Cardinals jersey -- a Pujols 5 on the back will fit right in. But don’t be surprised if you get a pat on the back wearing a Gibson 45 jersey. Some diehard fans wear a retro powder blue jersey with the birds and the bat hearkening back to the 1982 World Series winning season. It’s cool, and it’s blue ….
Which brings us to the only other color you’ll need in St. Louis: Blue, as is St. Louis Blues and St. Louis Rams. Blue, come to think of it, perfectly describes the feeling of Rams fans ever since the Patriots’ Adam Vinatieri’s kicked that game-winning field goal in the 2002 Super Bowl.

How to fit right in at Busch Stadium, at Scottrade Center and at the Edward Jones Dome:

Applaud such things as a batter advancing a runner to third base with a ground ball to the right side or a laser throw to a cut-off man that keeps a single from stretching to a double. St. Louis sports fans are among the most knowledgeable in the country; your knowledge of the game will draw you into conversation with the fan sitting next to you.
Once in conversation, say, "Oh, you’re from St. Louis? Where’d ya go to high school?" Then nod knowingly when they say Kirkwood, Gibault or CBC or any other myriad of high schools in the St. Louis area. Don’t ask why – just be charmed by this quirky, provincial bit of Americana.
If you catch a fly ball or get a stray puck, offer it to a munchkin near you. St. Louis is a family town and your behavior will endear you to an entire stadium – and probably get your picture on the Jumbotron.
If the outcome is well in hand, shrug off the exodus of fans trying to get out early and beat the traffic out of downtown. Even if the outcome isn’t well in hand, St. Louis fans have a tendency to make a sport out of early departure. I know this. I’m the offspring of a man who left a game with Steve Carlton working on 16 strikeouts the night of Sept. 16, 1969. The Cardinals were losing. It was a school night. Carlton ended up with a then-major league record 19 that night in a 4-3 loss to the Mets.
Politely refuse to do the wave. You’ll still see it late in baseball games for one reason: The kids like it, and there are a lot of them at baseball games, even on school nights.

The gospel according to St. Louis sports fans:

These doctrines (right or wrong) are held dear by St. Louisans and you’ll be well-served to never forget them.

Tony La Russa is the greatest manager to put on a Cardinals uniform, hands down, but in many fans’ eyes he has one flaw: He’s not Whitey Herzog.
Kurt Warner is a saint. Not the New Orleans version, the heavenly version.
The Stanley Cup is our Holy Grail. Of course it is. It’s the one trophy we’ve never been blessed with. Maybe this year?
If Stan Musial had played in New York or Boston or Chicago, he’d be the greatest player ever. And that’s probably true. Don’t go dissing The Man on the national scene – ever.
A brash kid named Tom Brady cancelled the Greatest Show on Turf and things have never been the same. Then Rams fans watched Mike Martz hang onto his offense and watch it die a slow painful death.
All the best broadcasters come from St. Louis. Jack Buck, Joe Buck, Harry Caray, Skip Caray, Bob Costas, Dan Dierdorf, Dan Kelly – all cut their broadcasting teeth in St. Louis
The Cardinals-Cubs rivalry is the greatest in baseball because no other rivalry is so one-sided. Let’s see: St. Louis Cardinals: 10 World Championships in last 100 years … Chicago Cubs: Zero. ‘nuff said.

Things you should never say in St. Louis (and why):

What if the Cardinals can’t sign Albert Pujols after 2010? Sure he’d look good in Yankee pinstripes. But a St. Louis summer without El Hombre? Might as well tell the sun not to shine.
These umpires are good, but whatever happened to that Don Denkinger? Cardinals fans still are testy about Denkinger’s call in Game 6 of the 1985 World Series. I know, we should get over it. We won in 2006. But Jorge Orta was clearly out!
Wasn’t it great to see Bill Bidwill finally get to the Super Bowl with Arizona? No, it really wasn’t. Hard feelings still linger in this city toward Bidwill, who took the NFL’s St. Louis Cardinals to Arizona after the 1987 season and left the city scrambling for a pro football franchise. OK, so we got the Rams eventually. OK, so we won the Super Bowl. But that was 10 years ago!
I hate soccer. You might, but don’t say it out loud. While fans passionately follow the Cards, Blues and Rams, their kids are playing soccer just as they played it when they were young.
I miss Brett Hull. Brett who? The Blues are back with T.J. Oshie, Chris Mason and Eric Brewer, and they’re not stopping until the Stanley Cup leads a parade down Market Street.
Will Mark McGwire ever get in the Hall of Fame? Frankly, we don’t want to talk about it. We gave our hearts to Big Mac in that glorious summer of 1998 only to have them broken in one afternoon in March 2005 at a Congressional hearing on steroids. When it comes to McGwire, we’re not here to talk about the past.

Pronunciation guide:

Missouri (MIZ-ZUR-REE). A term on the tip of many tongues since Gary Pinkel restored the roar in Columbia and Mike Anderson is doing the same thing on the basketball court. Some folks say “Miz-zur-rah” — but those people don’t live in St. Louis.
Albert Pujols (POO-HOLZ). Also pronounced “too-good-to-be-true.”
Marc Bulger (BUL-JER). The Rams quarterback does not rhyme with vulgar although sometimes the play of his offensive line does.
Interstate 44 (FARTY-FAR) A highway that leads into downtown and to all three main sports venues. The natives have trouble with the short “o” sound.
Keith Tkachuk (KA-CHUCK) The Blues’ veteran playmaker and team leader … leading a resurgence that could help Tkachuk turn the Blues’ fortunes into ka-ching!
Lori Chalupny (KA-LUP-NEE) St. Louis’ best and most prominent soccer player, she has 50 international caps, one World Cup in which she scored two goals and an Olympic Gold Medal. She’s also one of the reasons St. Louis has a women’s professional soccer team, the Athletica.
Red Schoendienst (SHANE-DEENST) – A former second baseman, Cardinal manager and Hall of Famer, he and Stan Musial make up Cardinals royalty.
Chaifetz Arena (CHAFE-ITS) – The home arena of the Billikens, the NCAA Division I basketball team of Saint Louis University. A big time venue to go along with a big-time coach, Rick Majerus
(MA-JARE-US).